FACETS: Chef Lordfer Lalicon and KAYA

In the quiet space between doubt and devotion, there’s a moment every creator faces—the point where something deeply personal begins to take shape in the world. For Chef Lordfer Lalicon, that moment wasn’t defined by certainty, but by questions that carried the weight of culture, identity, and responsibility. Before the recognition, before the Michelin nod, there was only the fear of whether Filipino food—his Filipino food—would be understood, accepted, and respected in spaces that had long overlooked it.

This edition of FACETS traces a story shaped not just by ambition, but by inheritance. One that moves through pop-ups and pressure, through the quiet burden of representation that many Filipinos carry long before they are ever asked to speak for it. It’s a journey of translating culture without diluting it, of holding onto what is sacred while opening doors for others to understand.

At the center of it all is KAYA—a name that means “to be able,” but more importantly, a reminder: kaya natin. We can do it. Built on family, sustained by community, and grounded in values that go beyond the kitchen, KAYA is more than a restaurant. It is a living expression of memory, sacrifice, and love.

In this conversation, we look beyond the accolades and into the emotional architecture of building something that carries both legacy and longing. From fatherhood to food, from exhaustion to pride, this is a portrait of Chef Lordfer Lalicon learning to stand fully in his story—without apology, without translation, and without losing himself along the way.

Before Kaya had a name, a room, or recognition, what were you most afraid of when you decided to build something of your own? 

Running a restaurant as both the owner and the chef is an immense responsibility.  I truly thought to myself, "Am I capable of representing Filipino food this way, for my people, for my family?"  How will people respond to this style of Filipino restaurant??

Being Filipino often means growing up invisible, then suddenly being asked to represent an entire culture. When did you first feel that weight in your career? 

I think I first felt the weight of an entire culture when we did Kaya pop-ups.  I had a Japanese Omakase restaurant and we started doing these small dinners in a another small room we had.  We invited guests, regulars, Filipinos, and non-Filipinos.  While creating menus and planning their experiences I kept asking myself, "Is this Filipino enough?"  How am I going to represent what it means to be a Filipino to me?"    Many people know nothing of Filipino food, yet alone eat a fine-dining Filipino meal.

Was there ever a moment when you questioned whether Filipino food belonged in fine dining spaces like Michelin kitchens? What did that doubt sound like in your head?

No, I never questioned if Filipino food belonged.  Filipino food is so delicious! It is dynamic, unique, and possesses depth, history and variety. All I think about is how to best present our delicious food.   How am  I going to uplift and educate our amazing culture?  People just don't know what they are missing until you give it to them in a way they can understand.

Kaya is named after your daughter. When service gets hard and the pressure is heavy, how does that name ground you? 

Every day during our pre-service, we go over our day, roles and responsibilities, and we end it with everyone putting their hands in and saying "KAYAAAA NATIN."This is a reminder that "We can do it," and Kaya the restaurant is all of ours.  We have a responsibility to our Ancestors and supporters to work through the hardship and pressure, to do our best,  because "KAYA NATIN."

How did becoming a father change the way you think about legacy, not just as a chef, but as a Filipino man?

Being a father changed everything.  Your children represent you. As a Filipino Chef restaurant owner, my children need to be taught their culture, food and what it means to carry on the traditions of our beautiful Filipino culture.    I hope I can instill all the values that I have learned from my parents.  Being a parent also made me softer and more understanding.  I have learned that we are all still children, learning, experiencing pain, and searching for our meaning, our 'why,' and how to proceed with life.  I have become much more patient and understand that how people follow depends on how you lead. 

Filipino food is rooted in care, generosity, and survival. How do those values show up in the way you lead your kitchen, especially on difficult days? 

Everyone is a person.  Everyone of our people is family.   We ensure they understand the importance of family and how we lift each other up.  We have built a work culture under the Values of Pamilya, Kapwa + Bayanihan, Utang Na Loob, and Mapanlikha.  On difficult days, I focus on using these values to lead in my decision making.  Leading with family in mind, lifting them up when they need me,  understanding their value as a team member and lastly being creative, and forward thinking when solving issues or problems.  

When Kaya earned Michelin recognition, what was the first emotion you felt, and what emotion surprised you afterward?

 I felt a abundant amount of Joy for my team and family.  This recognition is thanks to family, friends, my team and a bunch of sweat, blood, and tears!

 Success can be loud, but exhaustion is quiet. What parts of this journey have taken the biggest emotional toll on you? 

I think constant comparison of those around you [is the issue].  What should you be doing and what should you not be doing?  The toll of constantly questioning whether you are doing enough.  Opening a business is truly one of the most difficult things.  Keeping the restaurant open—paying bills, staff, insurance, rent, etc.—sometimes seems impossible.  Balancing the conflict between money and creativity is quite challenging.

As a Filipino cooking in America, do you ever feel like you’re constantly translating yourself? How do you protect the parts of your culture that don’t need explaining? 

I believe it's ok to explain your culture in general.  Part of living in community with others is helping them understand who you are and where you are from.  Kaya is our way of introducing who we Filipinos are and helping people love our culture.

There’s pride in being seen, but also pressure to get it right. How do you personally navigate representing Filipino cuisine on a global stage without losing yourself? 

I think you have to know really who you are, where you come from, and what you stand for. Luckily surrounded by all this!  My beautiful Filipino wife and 3 children.  I live in a multigenerational home with my wife's parents, and my parents live next to the restaurant.  My community is Filipino. I study, I learn as much as I can and I try to be 100% myself.  I want my kids to live like this, so I make sure I lead by example.

What sacrifices have people not seen behind Kaya’s success, especially from your family? 

Well, like I said I am supported by my wife and both sets of parents.  Without their help I could never have opened Kaya.  Their support is everything to me.  They take care of the kids when I work late, which is constantly.  I put my children to sleep only one or two nights a week... 

Is there a dish at Kaya that feels deeply personal, one that carries memory, longing, or even grief?

Kare Kare has been on the menu since we opened, and it is our top-selling dish besides lumpia.  Kare Kare is the first Filipino dish I taught myself how to make.  When I was 21, I met this beautiful girl Julie, I read, asked my parents and watched some videos on how to cook Kare - kare.  She said this was her favorite dish.  It turned out great, we had a wonderful first date in my dinky apartment.  That moment in time changed my life forever, that beautiful woman is now my wife and the mother of our three children: Kayah, Masayah and Hirayah.

On nights when the dining room is full and expectations are high, what keeps you emotionally present rather than just pushing through service? 

I love seeing people happily enjoying our food.  This is why I love being a chef. Watching people have a good time at Kaya keeps me present and wanting to serve them more.

Who were you cooking for before the awards, before Michelin, before the headlines? Are you still cooking for them now? 

I have always cooked for my family.  I will cook for them now and forever.  

Filipino culture teaches resilience, but rarely rest. How are you learning to take care of yourself within an industry that celebrates burnout? 

Umm.. This is a hard question.  I believe burnout is a choice.  It means you are not taking care of your needs, health, thoughts, and happiness.  Chefs often overwork because working is what they do best.  We truly must learn to reflect on how to live  a more balanced life by taking care of our minds, bodies and souls.  This can be quite challenging though.  There is no school on how to run a kitchen, a restaurant, a business and a family all at once.  I would say constantly controlling and changing your priorities daily will help in not having burnout.

If your younger self, the Filipino kid dreaming quietly, walked into Kaya today, what do you think he would feel?

Young me would be proud and amazed.  Kaya is truly special, I still walk in and feel so blessed to be where I am.

What does Kaya represent emotionally for you now, beyond being a restaurant?

Kaya is my legacy.  Kaya truly represents me and how I want the world to see me and what I want to provide to the world.

When your daughter grows older and looks back at your work, what do you hope she understands about why you chose this path?

I hope she understands what Kaya means to her culture and why I worked so hard to build it.  I hope she can understand hard work, sacrifice, and sucess and loving what you do.  I hope she takes all the lessons I teach her and learns how passion and commitment lead to happiness. I hope she sees my path and understands that life is beautiful,  waking up everyday, showing up, trying your best and laying everything on the line is a privilege and a choice.  I hope she can understand that this path has given us such a rich life, filled with love, amazing people, and sustenance.

 What does being Filipino mean to you today, after everything you’ve built and everything you’ve carried?

I am so proud to be Filipino.  To see the growth in our communities across the world and even in the Philippines.  I see the Michelin stars and all the talented Filipinos finally getting recognition.  We have such a beautiful, diverse palette of art, food and culture.  All the islands, all the countries and yet we stay connected.  We impose our flavors and style on different artistic and professional landscapes.  I love how our strong culture is embedded in our DNA and everything we touch gets a little kiss of Filipinoness...

Finally, if your story were reduced to one feeling served on a plate, what would that feeling be, and why? 

If my story were reduced to one feeling served on a plate, it would be "Love."   I have always believed that God is Love and I feel that I do everything through God.  God has blessed me and my duty is displayed through the work I do at Kaya.  Every day I approach Kaya with Love and I hope people can feel this when they sit at our table.